Thank-You, Mr. Roddenberry

         I for one look forward to the advent of a Roddenberrian society. This would come to pass with the invention of the “Replicator” which in the Star Trek universe was a microwave oven like device which could create anything you wanted out of thin air. Simply give it a voice command, and a few seconds later you could open the door and remove your chosen dish. Whether it be a chocolate milkshake or some slimy Klingon delicacie still writhing around in the bowl.  I’m not sure why they never used the technology to create dylithium crystals or other parts for the ship’s engine; since that thing was breaking down pretty much on a weekly basis.
           Given recent speculation about the existence and nature of sub-atomic particles a replicator should be possible… beyond science fiction. I am a humanities geek, not a science geek so my understanding of such things is very basic. Everything in our universe is made up of molecules; different molecules combine to make different substances. Molecules are made up of atoms (protons, neutron, electrons etc) which interact and/or react in particular ways, resulting in the afore-mentioned multi-variant molecules. Theory has it (I don’t know if this has yet been established) that atoms are made up of something smaller and less defined, which for want of a better term is being called a subatomic particle. The subatomic particle is assume to be a single entity; this is perhaps untrue and simply a limitation of human imagination and our scientific equipments' ability to observe anything smaller. When we do finally get down to the smallest possible level of material existence we should be able to arrange those entities into their fore barer of choice. Basically arrange the subatomic particles into an atom of our choosing, and then arrange the atoms to create the necessary molecule, bring a series of these molecules together resulting in the desired object. Voile REPLICATION….Thank you Gene Roddenberry.
         I actually didn’t come to talk about replicators so much as what replicators would mean to us as humans. Of course, most importantly would be my personal and unlimited supply of Lindt milk chocolate, lol. But on a more general note there would be no need of money… everything we need to survive and thrive would be at our finger tips. Beyond simple food production, dish style devices could replicate homes, even entire communities. My friend and I were discussing this last week and she asked, “If there is no money, who would live in the big houses?” My response was, “The person who feels the need  for a big house”.  A house would no longer be a status symbol or an investment; it would very simply serve your personal needs. It would be a reflection of who you are and how you see yourself.
         In a Roddenberrian society everyone would be doing work that they love. Artistic people would spend their days creating art. Mechanically inclined people would design and build new things. Healers would heal through their chosen medium. The scientific mind would explore unknown truths. Adventurers would go out and explore our physical universe. People are NOT lazy, shiftless or unmotivated by nature. As a species we desire more than anything, to be productive contributing members of our communities. Sadly very few people get to do the thing they love (and would do best) because of practical considerations. With no need of money everyone is free to be who they are. Fear, greed and ego (not to be confused with self-esteem or pride) would all evolve out of existence because no one would have anything to prove (except to themselves)…. That is my perfect world  
          O.K. science geeks…. Get on that will you. Start building a replicator! First order of business is to replicate the replicator. Have a joyous day my friends and dare to dream.

Lost Innocents

         Last week a young woman died in an apartment in Toronto. Her passing went un-noticed by the media; she wasn’t a celebrity like Amy or Kurt. There will be no magazine articles detailing (or speculating about) the circumstances of her death. She won’t be remembered by the public like John Belushi or Judy Garland.
         Those who knew Starleigh… will remember. Her mother remembers the warmth of that tiny little body when she held her baby girl in her arms for the first time. Her father remembers helping her take her first wobbling steps, her tiny little hands wrapped securely around his fingers.  They remember a little girl whose eyes brightened with excitement at the prospect of birthday cakes, Christmas lights and new Barbie dolls. They remember a little girl with a heart full of curiosity and wonder as she discovered the world. From her first days at school to her first dates with boys… very ordinary moments from a very ordinary life… all worth remembering.
         Every human-being starts life as an innocent beautiful child. Every family who has lost a child to addiction clings to the hope that one day they will get well and return to them. Last week, for Starleigh’s family hope died in an apartment in Toronto. The hope that she would be able to watch her beautiful daughter graduate, or walk down the aisle. The hope that she would watch her little ones’ eye brighten at the sight of Christmas lights. That she would be around to sing silly songs and teach them how to ride a bike. The hope that she would one day be ordinary again.
         Starleigh… you left too soon. But you are remembered, you are loved and yes… your life mattered.

Happy New You.

           New Year like no other time, prompts us to self examination. We look at our life to date and ask what would we change… more importantly what can we change. How do we proceed to become a better person? Last month my discussion group was talking about self-love (sadly lacking for so many), one of the ladies suggested that to love oneself would necessarily exclude any desire to change or grow. I, for one, love myself and have for as far back as I can remember. One of the things I love best about me, is my insatiable thirst for knowledge; academic (book smarts as granny would call it) or experiential (street/life smarts, also granny). So I like most of you am taking an annual inventory of my life and I will make a list of all of the things I would change. What about myself or my life should I hold on to and what should I get rid of and what should I add to make me and my life better.  

It is important when making such lists to remember the prayer of serenity…
                   God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
                   Courage to change the things I can and the
                   Wisdom to know the difference.

          I cannot effect the world beyond my touch, so an end to war, hunger, greed, fear and violence… are not topping my “to do” list. But I will do what I can, when I can in any given moment, to act against social injustice and poverty. There are so many important causes, I urge everyone to find one that speaks to your heart and do whatever you can to help forward their agenda. Trust me you will definitely grow from the experience ;-)
         That part of myself that believes in honour, humour & humanity…is irrefutably me and that will not change over time. No matter where I live or what is going on in my world I can’t imagine anything more important to my spirit than to be of service to others.
          So, for me I will hold onto my job with my wonderful little family… in spite of the early hours and modest pay, these people are such a joy to have in my life. Then there is my social work… (don’t get to spend as much time as I would like to) but that definitely stays. I want to volunteer more… it is so sporadic just now because my days off work are more often than not Tuesday & Thursday when Mission Services food-bank is closed. Perhaps I should find a similar position elsewhere on those Tuesdays & Thursdays, so I can volunteer somewhere at least once a week.  
        The one thing I want to add to my life is structure… I feel at loose end a lot of the time, kind of drifting from one day to the next. I work a few days a week and never know which will be my day off. As I say this perhaps, my schedule will have to be more of a checklist of things to be done in any given week. That would give me some structure with the flexibility to work around my job.
         So what are my New Year’s Resolutions
                                           1: Aquafit 2X weekly
                                           2: Volunteer 1X (minimum)
                                           3: Cook a full meal 1X weekly
                                           4: Take a class 1X weekly
                                           5: Write a blog 1X weekly
                                           6: Call an old friend 1X weekly
                                           7: Pottery / Paint 3X weekly

Wow I feel way better now that I’ve had a chance to sort that out… it doesn’t seem insurmountable …right? Lol. Have a 2012 filled with joy, peace & much love …    

Another Ghost of Christmas Past

When my father left, it was just before Christmas and just after the birth of my baby sister (she was the 6^th child for my parents).  My granny got on the phone and contacted every social agency and organization and church in an effort to ensure we would not be stranded without a Christmas. The spirit of the season and a lack of cross-referencing databases, made that year truly abundant. My young brother is a lifelong Maple Leafs fan because of a Leafs jersey which he received in that year when he was only 7. In those days fathers were seldom more than bread winners so Al’s absence from the kitchen table was barely noticed. A loss which was  more than made up for by 3 turkeys, 6 boxes of groceries and more gifts then any of us kids had ever seen. I’m sharing this story of my little brother, (now a middle-aged man; spending Saturday nights in a neighbourhood sports bar in Vancouver, cheering on the Leafs) to say we never know the level of impact an act of generousity will have. I imagine the people who donated that jersey have long forgotten... but my brother never will, and neither will I. 
Generousity abounds at Christmas and I love this season… my church announced a few weeks ago that we have “adopted a family” … the gifts have poured in for the family of 5 (we are a very small group never more than 40 at a service). This adopt a family idea has been done by private groups for more then half a century, that I know of. It has become very popular through community care agencies over the past few decades. Yehhhh…. Christmas!  What has always troubled me is that a family in need does not cease to be poor on January 5^th; so after Christmas then what?
When I was a child an organization called “the Travelers” had an adopt a family program, each member-family would adopt a needy- (insert whatever politically correct crap you prefer for that word) family. That family insured that every holiday their adoptees had a hamper of food and every child had a gift on their birthday … there would be chocolate bunnies at Easter and sometimes even tickets to a hockey game (local minor league) or a circus. We were adopted by the Muncasters of Thunder Bay… So thank you Mr. & Mrs. Muncaster , Diane and your brother Whatz-z-name. You set a good example and possibly had some small part in making me into the person I am today. Over the years I have frequently expressed dismay that this ongoing adoption model is not practiced today. It was explained to me Betty-Lou Souter (of Community Cares Niagara) that privacy issues would make the concept impossible.  I am happy to say my church is trying to disprove that theory. The care agency worker will act as a liaison between us and our family, so we can provide the niceties of life for this family years round. I would like to see us go past simple birthdays and special events to providing funds for school events, clubs, sports and summer camps. These are experiences every child should have at least once. Our family will call their worker with a request, eg: “Mikey’s class is going to the ROM and the trip cost $40”. The worker takes 2 minutes to email us with the info ( our contact info is in the families file) Then we take two minutes to email $40 to the worker and Mikey can go on his class trip. No privacy violations here just 10 minutes (collectively) out of lives of one case worker and a church secretary.
Anyway I hope everyone has a joyous holiday… keep this spirit of generousity and good will alive as you travel through 2011. The world is a better place with you in it, MERRY CHRISTMAS (insert your holiday of choice here ;-).

  

Accessorizing

Hope you had a chance to check out the new website and as you can see I've given the blog site a new look to co-ordinate. Among the changes I've made, is to activate a translator feature, given the many different countries that visit the blog site it seems only fair. So if anyone actually uses it please leave a comment card and let me know if it works ;-)
Have a joyous day.
Bonny 

New Website

After several format changes I'm really liking the new layout I put on last night, this could be the one ;-) Among the new features is a guestbook, so if you have suggestions, comments or words of encouragement, you have a place to express yourself. Also the home page will carry a thought of the day (or two days), short bits of wit and wisdom to be changed often.
This situation is an example of how obstacles become opportunities. Due to some miscommunication between myself and my service provider, my original website and all of its content was lost forever. Yes, I was angry and frustrated, but after a couple of days. I realized that much has changed since I first decide to make my journey of homelessness, I have changed and the website should change too.
I am more convinced then ever of the connectedness of humanity. Buddha said that we are, "all the same in our desire to experience joy and avoid suffering..." I have confirmed the truth of this among all the people I have known rich...poor and everything in between.
I am also more convinced then ever that, to have a real impact helping people move forward toward their own happiness, we need to connect with the individual. The work of agencies is important and will always be necessary. Even if we adopt affordable home ownership programs and get all the working poor out of the shelters; there will always be that 30% who are street people (drunks, druggies & drop-outs) who will need food and shelter; harm reduction as we call it in the industry.
 If you read my blog on happiness you will remember that the principles of happiness are pretty constant but the key to open a person's heart to allow happiness in, is as unique as the key to a house. So to effectively help someone move forward in their life we (professional social workers/life coaches) have to be willing to open ourselves up to building a personal connection with our clients.
As for everyone else, treat each other (friend or stranger) with kindness and respect. Do no harm and whenever possible, leave a situation better than you found it.
Have a joyous day. Remember to check out the new and still evolving Angels of the Road website.

Happiness is, a warm bunny…. in a nice stew.

Last week our discussion group asked the question, “Why are most people in our culture unhappy?”  This is a very complex issue because most people misunderstand the nature of happiness; most people think happiness is being in a good mood all the time. Happiness is not a mood... it is a state of being. A happy person can still feel a range of emotional responses. I am a happy person, I am angered by injustice, saddened by ignorance, proud of the young adults at Occupy sites, warmed by a baby’s laughter, frustrated by setbacks,  joyous in shared moments etc…etc…etc … in all this I remain a happy person. My granny used to say, “If you are happier than not, more often than not. Then you have a good life”. When we let go of the expectation that we must be in a good mood all the time, it will be easier to allow ourselves to achieve a state of happiness. Again money is not the source of or an impediment to happiness. Everyone has problems / challenges; for the poor these revolve around material matters and for the wealthy problems stem from ambiguity in relationships and emotional matters.
What is this state of being called HAPPINESS and how does one get there? O.K. let me give this a try. Happiness has three component parts…Peace of mind… Joy of life & Love of self.
Peace of mind is achieved by living guilt free and regret free. To do this first we need to do our very best in every moment. Whether we place first, last or in between, if we gave it our best there is nothing to apologize for. And never do or say anything you cannot own with pride.
Joy of life (or joie de la vie as the French say) is achieved mostly through gratitude. Be grateful for even the smallest things, when your mind is focusing on what is right in your life you have less time to fret about what is wrong. To once again share a folksy life lesson from my granny, “You don’t gotta look too far to find somebody worse off then you.” So if the only gratitude you can muster is being glad you are not them…start there.  Generosity also figures into this component, not just generosity with money, but be generous with your spirit. Treat everyone with kindness and respect and forgive easily.
Love of self… this is a rare thing because self love is often confused with ego or narcissism. In reality it is about accepting the good in yourself and forgiving your mistakes. Show yourself the same kindness and respect that I ask you to show your fellow man. As my Christian friend would say, “God doesn’t make mistakes…” You have a valuable purpose in this life. Find it, live it and be happy.
The above three are basic principles for happiness… the key to individual happiness is as unique as a key to a door, they may look the same but only one will actually successfully open the lock. I believe happiness is our natural state of being. If we are unhappy it is because something is blocking us, try to step outside yourself and look at your life objectively. How are you in conflict with these principles? If you can figure that out and make the necessary changes you will be able to find the key to your own personal happiness. If you are just starting your journey of self discovery (recovery) I recommend reading Don Miguel Ruiz’s books The Four Agreements and later released The Fifth Agreement. Have a joyous day my friends and we will talk again soon.